Welcome to the first in a series of Apprentice posts, chronicling Series 5 in the life of Sir Alan Sugar’s Apprentices.  Read my thoughts of the task, the candidates, my favourite Sir Alan’ism and more!

The Task

Week One’s task was to make the largest profit by starting a cleaning company.  What they cleaned was up to the team.  They had 10 hours to complete the task.  It’s great that the task is focused on Profit and not sales.  So often you see teams trying to make the most sales but I think it important to show the costs involved.

Both teams quickly decided on their names, Girls “Ignite” Boys “Empire”, personally not convinced by the name Empire.

Mona hesitantly agreed to be team leader for the girls.  They split into two “sub teams” both cleaning cars.  Initially they started with Stretch Humvees with a cringe worthy negotiation.  Yasmin lead the negotiations for one team wanting £300 for 3 cars, the salesman disclosed that 3 cars currently cost him £60 (total).  They beat him up to £40 per car but not before team leader Mona told him he was wrong and there was no way that they could get that price.  Then went on to kerbside cleaning.  The other half of the girls team were cleaning classic cars, (poorly) the customer was disappointed with the job done and didn’t let them carry on with more cars inside the showroom however I did think Debra lead negotiations well.  They moved on to a supermarket and the money started rolling in as they were just giving simple outer cleans.  For the last part of the evening the team looked for cars on people’s drives to clean.

Empire the boy’s team was led by Howard who quickly got the team out into the field half at St Pancreas shining shoes for £4 a pair and half at a minicab company cleaning cars.  Howard told the car cleaning sub team not to offer the inside and to manage costs.  The work cleaning cars was more than they imagined as they agreed to clean inside and out so the shoe shiners went to help them and spent the rest of the day at the one taxi firm.  Philip Taylor showed great initiative early in the morning getting straight onto the phone organising the taxi contract (though he did then go on to agree to clean inside)

The Boardroom

Ignite took £370 and spent £196.45

Empire took £347 and spent 107.39

So Empire the boys team won the first task with higher profits despite being one man down.  Their prize was a cocktail making lesson from two of the countries top cocktail makers.

The girls went to the Bridge Cafe and Mona wanted answers from the other sub team.  The two sub teams sat facing each other throwing insults.  The team taking the least took the most flack the majority going to Anita, who didn’t really know how to wash cars.

The girls returned to the penthouse knowing for one it would be their final night.

The girls returned to the boardroom the next day knowing one would be fired.  Sir Alan initially defined the failure as that of spending too much money as they actually took too much money but their costs were out of control.

Mona threw the responsibility of the costing onto Anita who claimed she was only charged with totting up the figures not controlling a budget.

Mona chose to bring Debra (The sub team leader) and Anita back to the boardroom.  The rest of the team escaped back to the penthouse.  On returning to the boardroom Mona accused Debra of dishonesty and failure as her sub team made the least money.  Though Debra fought back critising Mona’s task management and costings.

Anita claimed to “just be a team member” as if she has no responisbilty and therefore she was not responisble.  Sir Alan accused her of not playing her part and being happy that “they were in budget on their costs” when they had spent the maximum they could.

Debra gave a passionate speech about her qualities and what she had learnt.

Mona focused her final words by critising the other girls sub team.

Alan summed up saying Mona had spirit but no business acunmin.  Anita was on the back of that van and saw lots of money flow out.  Debra was leading the sub team and made a lot of mistakes.

Anita put herself forward as one of Britains best business prospects (in the CV) and showed no initiative and on that basis she was fired.

Anita Shah - FIRED

Sir Alan’ism of the week!

There were so many, during the opening of the show but here are some of my favourites.

First Prize you get to work for me, second prize doesn’t exist

Are you tough enough to put up with it, cos matey wasn’t

They’re either very clever of very dumb

and this weeks winner….

I know the words to Candle in the wind, don’t make me Elton John

Some of the Apprentices quotes are nearly as good as Sir Alan’s.  The Apprentice Your Fired chose this as the best – I’m a rough tough cream puff from New York

Apprentice Tweets from Twitter

Twitter went into meltdown tonight, I couldn’t keep up at one point I was receiving 100 Apprentice tweets a minute and tweetdeck will only hold 200.  Of the ones I read here were a few of my favourites.

http://www.twitter.com/_LM Friend from uni Ben Clarke is on apprentice tonight. He once drew a willy on Tor’s face.

http://www.twitter.com/dancohen243 This year’s Apprentice candidates are dumb & arrogant – a great combination. One large picnic and not many sandwiches…..

http://www.twitter.com/joningham Did Paula actually say anything tonight? (on the Apprentice)

http://www.twitter.com/Wossy Apprentice back and on top form. Gotta love Sir Alan, but I have a man crush on Nick. Shall i try to get Nick and Margaret on the show ?

The Apprentice in the News.

I was very disappointed to read an article on the Telegraph’s website with a full interview with the loser Anita Shah.  It makes a mockery of the program.  I realise it was all filmed months ago but come on Telegraph, let us live in suspense and see it for ourselves!

My Final Thoughts

I enjoyed the show its much more an entertainment show than a business show, but I do feel the wrong person was fired.  Mona took the lead initially and but was then really hesitant to be team leader.  i’m sorry but she can’t have it both ways.

Going on she didn’t have a plan, didn’t control costs and it annoyed me she attacked others constantly in the board room rather than standing up for what she did.  For this I think Mona should have been fired.

If she had been a bit more keen to be team leader I may have agreed with Sir Alan as I do feel Anita just hung in the background throughout the episode.

I was glad the task was based around profit and not sales as this shows truer business values.

Next week – It’s corporate catering for city slickers.

What did you think of the episode, was the right person fired?  Who will win?  Leave a comment!